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Tuesday, January 10, 2012

A very late new year wish and notes for fulltime housewives out there..

Humph!

Dah berapa lama tak menjenguk blog ni, dah bersawang-sawang, sama macam empunya blog. Hey, happy belated new yeAR peeps...baru 9 hari kita menjejaki tahun baru, banyak betul perkara yang berlaku. Tahun ni bermula dengan agak perlahan. Maybe terlalu sibuk dengan urusan harian, my life 4 times busier than last year, what a heck but this is life. Eh, korang rasa Michael Jackson tu hidup lagi ke? Keh..keh..keh...melencong kau!

Well, actually tahun ni anak bujang dah masuk standard 1. Phewww...kus semangat. Macam-macam perkara sepanjang minggu pertama persekolahan. Ada yang lucu, ada yang seronok di lihat tapi banyak juga yang menuntun perasaan. Hairan betul budak zaman sekarang, punyalah berani, sampai xde sorang pun yang menangis di hari pertama. Fuh, bangga, siap leh buAt lawak dengan cikgu. Kalau aku lah yang jadi cikgu, sure xde masa nak mengajar, sure asyik tergelak je. Lawak. Cikgu suh siapkan kerja sebab nak bawak g jalan2 (maksudnya di kawasan sekolah), tapi ada suara dr belakang yang bertanya "kita nak pergi ke rumah hantu ke, cikgu? Even time aku menulis ni pun, masih bersisa gelak penuh kelucuAn. Hahahaha...korang sangka tak akan keluar soalan macam tu...kids!

Time to school...bersama di adik yang menjadi PA tetap si abang....
Selepas hari ke-3, kalau fb ask me "what's in your mind". I would say "RESIGN". That's the only words that i have in my mind at that moment. Kenapa? Ada banyak sebab, dan sebab yang paling utama ialah aku kasihan yang teramat sangat sebab anak aku terpaksa bangun awal-awal pagi sbb kena bersiap sedia ke sekolah, van yang hantar dan ambil, then sampai di taska jam 2 lebih then rushing kena bersiap untuk kelas agama lak. Entah sempat makan atau tak. Then habis kelas agama, balik semula ke taska, bukan rumah sendiri,meaning he cant rest like at his own house. And i can imagine he skipped zohor and maybe asar sebab takde siapa yang boleh push mcm his own mama and babah did. Poor boy..  
This is the thoughest moment as a mom in my life, where it leads to non-stop crying for almost 2hours after ISyak. Maybe most of the working mother out there can understand this feeling...unexplain feeling. I cant bear to picture out his smile while wave his hand to me from the van that full of other kids. He is smiling but it's really broke my heart...berkecai-kecai bagaikan kaca terhempas. Sedih, sebak, hiba bergabung menjadi satu perasaan negatif yang sukar digambarkan. Moms out there, can you feel what i feel?

Kak eynda and all fulltime housewive out there, if you read this, i want you to know that you are so lucky that you are "capable" to stay at home and be a fulltime housewive and be there to your kids anytime they want when we, working mom have a darn limited time to do that. Your kids is so lucky that they can see their mom greets them and ask wheather they had a good day or not everytime they back from school where other kids have to manage themselves till their parents back from work,normally after 8pm. Your kids are lucky that they have mom to sit and study with them, where most of kids have to wait for their parents to share their wonderful story. And you are so lucky that you can see and fully-involved for their development while we, working mom missed alots of beautiful moments with our kids. You are just lucky and im so jelous.

Anyway, like i said, this is life. Yes, it is true that sometimes we have few choices only in our life and to make a good decision, most of the times it need sacrifice. I, as a working mom sacrifice my feeling and my rest time to make sure few hours after i reach home is a time for me to listen to my kids. Memang, ia tak sama but better late than never. I just want them to know that whatever it is,they are important and matter to me. All the time...

Allah, please listen to my doa and protect my kids from any danger. For a man who plays a very important role in this family, i just want you to know that i cant do this without ur support. Thank you so much for always be there when i need you. Thank you for your hug when i think no hope for me at all. Me and our lil' gems loves you so much.

Thanks all for read my blog.
Till then...double thumbs-ups for all moms in the world.


With love,
Zur

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